When the women who work in the ticket kiosk at Old Quebec St. mall point me out to the Vin Joy shoe guy saying, ‘’there she is”, or ‘’there’s that lady’’, in what role exactly, am I being identified for others then?
Is that bus driver from the new bunch blushing because he knows, that I know, that he identified me by my bys pass for Scottish Rose?
Has Scottish Rose passed that information along to other bus passengers and seniors as well as her daughter, “Rosemary’s baby,’ who allegedly works at the University at O.V.C.?
Who were the members of a group of people who passed through the Library yesterday (July 14, 2006) all whom I like to identify as the ‘’men in black!’ (They looked totally out of place) There were four older men, and two women, also in basic black) looking very stately, like CIA agents, or university types, or ‘alienists’ or lawyers and judges on a lunch break, or perhaps, even a group of funeral directors. As they passed through the front entrance, one of the women spotted me on the word processor and nudged the other one, “there she is now…” Which version of ‘she’ was I then?
How many cars does Dr. Eric Zarins have? I know of two. Did he tell the old horse that he saw me on July 5th, on Riverview drive? Did Dr. Zarins once ask a residential patient who used to go out for awhile with me on the grounds, how she got along with me and what I was like? Did she describe me as ‘nicer’ than some others?
What rumors out of the General hospital has Lorraine, who now cleans there, passed along to her friends and relatives? What about Suzanne, the R.N.?
Why are the bus radios turned back up again now? Is it because they know there is no point in turning them down to keep me from ‘finding out’ what most of the population of Guelph is keeping ‘secret’?
Did Marlene K. (M) share her assessment of the situation between me and Dale with her neighbours and the university students who boarded with john next door? How about with Sue Rogers? Or Cheryl F.? How about the Italian couple I had a year or so ago as clients, the wife of which allegedly suggested to others that she HAD to stay up all night with me because if she did not, I would be stealing from them? She also informed with obvious ‘suspicion’ that she “used to live on Liverpool St.” (Not that any landlords would have a problem respecting their tenants boundaries of course!) In fact, right after I told Suzanne K, that I thought I had just caught my landlord coming out of my apartment when I was out, and he wasn’t expecting me, I hear his daughter saying, ‘She said you did an illegal entry’ and his reply, ‘illegal entry my ass!” Did Marlene get lots of news and views from Suzanne K. who worked for Comcare and who was assessing everything by what Dale was feeding her constantly in order (IMO) to keep HER co-operating with HIS ‘hidden’ agenda of domination?
Is Bernard’s ‘friend’ Vasha (sp?) aware that I am aware she suggested to Bernard that I should not be trusted? Did she get that idea from other lawyers' offices? Did the firm of McElderry and Morris help her with that? Is she aware that I am aware that she allegedly illegally entered my apartment while suggested that it would be me who might do that? Is she aware of her OWN part in Dales’ “Theatre of the Absurd? (I’m sure Dale is aware of most of this. When it is acted out for him, he hears it from HIS hidden perspective, and is getting a great deal of entertainment from listening to all of these people performing for him as an ‘effect’’ of his pre-planned ‘game.’) I also am aware of it but I am alone with my truth am I not? That is also what tickles the heck out of Dale; knowing that I know what he did and continues to do but being unable to ‘do anything about it!’ (har har har)
Did Bernard’s ‘friend’Vasha try to justify her behaviour by invalidating my objection to it and telling a new story to someone down at the “News Café” when it still existed at old Quebec St.? Is Bernard aware that I am aware of al his little ploys etc. like the one in relation to Vasha’s suggestion? Is he aware that I am aware of the reason for his sudden change of heart on that point? Did he get his idea of me as passed on to him by Donna H. former owner of the building and employer of Harry M.? Is it also true that he defines me for other tenants and trades people, asks them if they have heard any rumours and asks the tenants who are university students to fill him in if the should hear anything else? If you ask him how many times he has been in my apartment without my knowledge or consent, what do you think he would say? If he found out that some of the people he ‘allegedly’’ took in with him were going to tell the truth about it, what story would he have then? Does he ever like to try to justify his behaviour by blaming the tenant’s reactions to it? Does he alter reality a little bit so it will sound a certain way, lie suggesting that tenants are only complaining about no notice of things like turning the water off for instance, because they are afraid they may ‘turn on the taps and b unable to wash their hands or something? Did you know he says he does not need to give notice after 9am or so because ‘everybody should be out of the shower by then’? Does that seem a little ‘judgmental’ to you and perhaps a bit disrespectful of the rights of others to live their lives on their own terms and not his , as if he represented a ‘norm’?
Is it also true that Vasha suggested the smell of the glue used by Ray to replace the bathroom tile was not the glue at all? Did she suggest it might be that I was running a drug lab from my apartment?
Did this come from rumoured suggestions of Homewood staff that my membership in Al-Anon (the group of friends and relatives who cope with addicts) indicated I was an alcoholic? Is that where the paramedic who tried to talk me out of going to the hospital with a cardiac arrhythmia got the idea? From the rumour mill? Did that paramedic suggest to Dr. Ray G. that I did not have a hear t problem that I was probably just drunk and ‘seeking attention’? Did that fact that I had not had any drinks at all have any affect on the way I was treated, or did they even bother to look? Is this why Dr. C…a, ever so casually, asked me if I had been drinking and suggested that that could be my problem? Is it also true that some of the Homewood staff involved fantasized that my breakdown, the diagnosis of which was ‘psychosis NYD”, was actually caused by an imagined drug use of my own choice?
Did anyone make note of the fact that I had reported to Homewood that I also felt that I was being drugged with something? Does everyone know that no tests were made? Do you know how easy it would be to find out if I am a drunk? How many times does anyone see me at the liquor stores or beer stores? Would it be close to never? How many times do you see me in bars? Would that be pretty much never? Also/ Does evidence actually play any part in the group fantasy? Or does that must cause you all too much distress to see the truth about yourselves and your disgusting group behaviour?
Do you think the fact that the paramedic was ‘diagnosing my heart problem as ‘drunkenness’ had anything to do with the fact that he had looked around my apartment and had seen that I had an appointment with Ken Kruger, which was stuck to my calendar?
Do you think that he know that I know that? Or am I too stupid and /or crazy to have his number?
Do you think all this crap that you were and are, spreading all over has had a negative effect on my life at all? Do you think you can figure out why I am considered to be ‘at effect, or the ‘loser’ and why Dale sees himself ad ‘’at cause, or the winner’, in what he defines as the ‘game of life.” Can you think of any reason why he may smirk to himself a lot about all of this?
Which nurse at the Elliot told them on the night shift that I had been ‘insane’? Was it perhaps Paula F. who worked on H3 at Homewood while Dale was suggesting I was a mental case” (she is the Paula F. mentioned on the tapes they listened in on every day) Or, was it Nancy F. (not her married initial) who was also on the Hamiltons at the time and also allegedly eagerly sharing whatever HER version of the reality was between dale and myself, all over town? After Johanna allegedly suggested to Sherry B. and staff at the Elliot that I had had my privileges removed by Homewood for my incompetence, was Sherry the one who suggested that they could do that at the Elliot too?
Was Terry J. (also operating with a ‘hidden’ agenda) happy about that?
Did she ask the hairdresser there to watch for ‘signs’ and then report anything she ‘suspected’ to either her at home or Sherry? Did you know that Terry had one of the resident’s caregivers doing the same thing? This woman would look for faults even in what I said which was the same as what terry said but which was ‘perceived’ as ‘different.’ This woman would also screw up her hateful face at me while considering herself to be ‘hidden’ and then share her opinions about me with other residents and their relatives. I was told by Terry that I would ‘like’ her and that I was to sit with her. Guess why? I did not ‘like’ either one of them for obvious reasons. Terry, by the way was just my equal, but seemed to think of herself as my ‘superior.’ This woman, acting as ‘spy’ for Terry, was calling Terry at home to report her opinions, as Terry had instructed her to do, which, by the way, are not appropriate in this situation. It is the business of the Elliot and my employer only and it is another boundary violation for this woman to agree to do such a thing.) Did you know that it was also rumoured that some of the staff thought it was Terry who was scary? (That was because she seemed to believed that she was the ONLY one who ‘really’ cared and she also had people come in from outside to instruct STAFF on how to do things. )
Terry also allegedly pointed me out to seniors on the bus and told them stories, which they allegedly passed on to others. Always in ‘secret’ of course) I found Terry to be deceitful and saccharine from MY perspective, which you might also if you were in my position. Under normal circumstances, I ignore such people, and I am not interested in ‘socializing’ with them. That is because I see what is there; not because I am seeing something which is not there. Sometimes it is those ‘superior’ others who ‘fail to see what is right in front of them’ ( a concept from his training exercises) which is something that Dale and I BOTH know about this situation, even if most of the rest of you do NOT know.If it is all right for all of these ‘normal’ people to run off at the mouth like this, then I must be ‘normal,’ only if I join them; so I have.
Stay tuned. I will keep gossiping along with all of you, as my new "norm", until you decide to ‘do something about it’ and what you need to do is simply investigate the ‘concrete’ results of the abstract training. For you GET the understanding, only when you integrate the concrete side with the abstract side of IT.
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